Wednesday, March 4, 2015
Along the Warm Ridge
Some roads are longer than others. Some paths. And at night the moon seems to move slowly through certain swathes of sky, while you can imagine the stars singing sad songs like those from France in the early twentieth century. Each note lasts at least a thousand years. Maybe you can't ask a bird to leave a bread crumb alone - and sooner or later we all have to sleep in an unfamiliar clearing, blankets covered in frost. There are lonelinesses I still ask for, and women who provide them, as surely as cardinals are sure of red. Well, we are all trying, or so I tell myself at 3 a.m., studying drifts of snow in faint-and-growing-fainter moonlight. How tired I am of my inclination to praise, and how tired I am of pretending to be interested in what has never held my attention, and how tired I am of pretending anyone is broken. Travelers come and go across the exterior landscape while we rest in God. Can I say it that way and mean it? At last? Coming in later for tea, sitting with the dog by a south-facing window. It's never about us only, is perhaps the hardest lesson to learn. How happy I am - briefly - to be alone in the dark, my fingers trailing slowly along the warm ridge of her spine.
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This is why I read you, Sean. For what lies wordless behind the words. For the way you see and convey how we sing our wavering and off-key hallelujahs (well, at least in my case :)) even as we cling to the familiar safety and pain of our lamentations.ReplyDelete
We are all birds who find certain crumbs irresistible until we don't, and no one can tell us when we will bust out of whatever our cage may be. . .but luckily, there is enough space between the bars that when we choose, we can see those fingers pointing at the moon. For that, for you, I am more than grateful.
Thank you for the kind words, Cheryl . . . I am very grateful for your presence here . . . it is very much a reciprocal admiration & gratitude!ReplyDelete
Been in PA for almost a week. Came home to a little sip of spring in the air and "Choose Once Again" in the mailbox. Thanks for the recommendation, Sean. Felt something shifting while I was there and the ego dug in . . . in earnest. Reading the Course this way helps me soften and "see" without so much thought of "me" involved in the process. So easy to forget what it's all about . . . and what it's not. Enjoy your weekend.ReplyDelete
thanks, Cheryl . . . reading the course in "verse" form is interesting. Tara Singh did a lot of this . . . and I find that reading it without the notation of paragraph & sentence allows the text to flow better . . . I have some old copies of ACIM before they added the citation details, and it is truly a different sort of reading . . . hope all is well!ReplyDelete